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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a guy with no arms & no legs laying in a pile of leaves? Russel"

"FOUND: IPod Touch 4G, 32GB, white. Must be able to match the naked pics I found in the photos."

"I saw a lady at work today doing ""breathing exercises"" and realized for the first time how lucky I was that breathing came naturally to me."

"what if you looked as good as your best selfie all the time wouldnt that be wonderful"

"Wife ran into my ex girlfriend today. I asked if she still looked good? Always wondered what the worst thing I could say was. That was it."

"Which global disasters happen when you drop a roast turkey? The downfall of Turkey, the break-up of China, and the overthrow of Greece."

"I wish life was like a bad hand of spades No Trumps . . . . . . . . . ...I'll see myself out."

"Do molecular biologists wear designer genes?"

"Why are most Hotwheel cars Ford? So people can grow up getting used to pushing a Ford."

"Why do bicycles fall over? They are two-tired."