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Joke of the Day

"A woman lights a cigarette after intercourse ""Do you ever smoke after sex?"" she asks her husband. ""I've never checked."""

"What is brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre"

"No matter how nice your kids are... ..German children are Kinder."

"About to go out and make some foreign dude's night by butchering the pronunciation of the food I'll be ordering."

"I just saw a guy with leather pants get out of an IROC-Z. I wanted to say ""Welcome to the future, traveler. You're going to love it here!"""

"What is white outside, and black inside [NSFW] Justin Beiber with Usher dick in his anus."

"What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Hell if I know!"

"[in hospital] -dude what happened? ""I got hit by a bu- [a bus taps on the window, does neck slice motion] -I mean I fell down the stairs"""

"I Ejaculated 6 Feet Earlier. Which is weird, as I usually ejaculate semen."

"People who hit Reply All to 20+ recipients and then say, ""Thanks!""--please know, you are going to Hell. Nothing can save you. Nothing."