113629

Joke of the Day

"What I said: I forgot my book. What the teacher heard: I hate school, I hate you & I don't want to make something out of my life."

Next Joke
 
"Elf cop:""We got a robbery in progress on Candy Cane lane. Hit the light Rudolf! *Rudolf sticks nose through sunroof*"
"i saw this homeless guy talking to himself and i was like, ""who is he talking to?"" then i thought ""who am I talking to?"""
"""Nailed it."" -inventor of crucifixion"
"Dolly Parton and Princess Diana Go To Heaven"
"I love when cashiers ask you if that's everything. Oh no, I'd also like all this invisible shit."
"I've got 99 problems and they're all luftballons."
"A man goes to the doctor... After looking at the man for 2 minutes the doctor says: ""Mr. Willow, you need to stop masturbating!"" ""Why, doctor?"" ""Because I can't exmine you otherwise!"""
"adult coping mechanisms: drinking, Netflix, pretending nothing's wrong"
"Boys go to Mars to get more candy bars. Girls go to Venus to get more penis."
Terms & Privacy