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Joke of the Day

"Three hunters come across some tracks in the middle of the woods... The first hunter says its wolf tracks the second says its bear tracks the third was hit by a trian"

"What is 6.9? A wonderful thing ruined by a period"

"*waits for you to fall asleep* *rolls out from under your bed* *moisturizes your knees and elbows*"

"What's the difference between a lobster with a boob job and a Greyhound terminal? One's a busty crustacean and the other's a crusty bus station."

"I'd make jokes about midgets, but that would be little of me."

"A friend and I got into a fight on a ski lift. It was an uphill battle."

"What is the difference between an elephant and a flea? An elephant can have fleas but a flea can't have elephants !"

"What do you call a pickled female deer? A dilldoe."

"Why do French tanks have rearview mirrors? To see the battle."

"Told my doctor I wanted him to check my prostate without lube He put both his hands on my shoulders and went to town"