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Joke of the Day

"We all say tomato. There is no alternate pronunciation."

"Doctor will I be able to play piano after the procedure? Doctor: Yes, I don't see why not. Patient: That's wonderful I could never play piano before!"

"My favorite moment of the day is deciding I'm not going to do anything productive. That moment is now."

"I just found out why the literacy rate in Greece is among the lowest ...it's because everything they learn in school is Greek to them."

"What do you get when you cross a collie with a trumpet? A Lassie who plays brassie!"

"Be the reason they create new laws."

"Why couldn't the Japanese guy see his car? Because he had a cataract!"

"Chuck Norris can't fuck with Kanye! lool Chuck Norris is the only person Kanye West won't interrupt!"

"Jenner If Bruce(now) Caitlyn Jenner is kidnapped, do they put his picture on the side of a half & half bottle?"

"What's the capital of Greece? About 10."