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Joke of the Day

"I routinely take 8 flights of stairs for no other reason than to avoid idle chit chat in the elevator. See, hating people can be healthy!"

"A man waiting for a heart transplant... ... says ""I only want the heart of a dead lawyer."" ""Why?"" asks the doctor. ""I want one that's never been used."""

"Exclamation point rules ! - good !! - excited !!! - awesome !!!! - starting to get creepy !!!!! - cheerleader creepy !!!!!! - own 20 cats"

"What's the best thing about sleeping with twenty two year old's? There is twenty of them."

"What's the unluckiest kind of cat to have ? A catastrophe !"

"How Would You Describe the A.I. for a Robotic Dog? A bitch to program."

"her: I have this weird fantasy where my man shaves me while I sleep me: k her: *wakes up with no eyebrows"

"The Barenaked Ladies have been pulled from the rubble alive, following the Nepal Earthquake. Its been One Week."

"The last airline I flew charged for everything. Except for the bad service. That was free."

"Yet another tragedy struck the music world today. Police responded from a call to a California hotel room occupied by Justin Beiber. When they arrived on the scene, he was still alive."