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Joke of the Day
"the worst part of the robot uprising will be the constant software updates"
Next Joke
"Why do blondes have big belly buttons? Their boyfriends are also blonde. [A joke I heard in grade 6.]"
"Punishment Not talking to your husband to punish him is like trying to kill a fish by drowning!"
"What's Gordon Ramsay's favorite sex position? FUCKING RAAAWWW!!!"
"Ariel was a minor and couldn't sign a legally binding contract. You'd think the king of the ocean's lawyers could get that shit thrown out."
"I'm so glad I found Twitter...I finally have a rock solid Alibi for my Google Search History!"
"""FOR SALE: blender, like new. Does NOT make things taste like crayons ALSO FOR SALE: wax fruit, slightly scratched."""
"You know what gets me down? Elevators."
"Guy knocking on bathroom door after sex: I think I love you. Me stringing tampons together, making a rope to climb out the window: Okay...."
"My wife's cock crazy... Two licks then she goes nuts."