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Joke of the Day

"Thank you for explaining the word 'many' to me. It means a lot."

"Michaelangelo: Yea, sure, I'll paint your ceiling. *To himself* Errybody gon be naked tho."

"I want to start a kosher hotdog company And call it Anne Franks..."

"What do you call a semiaquatic, furry little animal than never amounted to anything in it's life? An *otter* failure (I'll see myself out)"

"I had a dream I went to Hell and Satan forced me to sing karaoke with him. That's right, the Devil made me duet."

"My sensitive toothpaste can't stop crying."

"I don't know whats more awkward, answering Dora, or sitting in silence while she stares at you."

"What has bottom on the top? Legs."

"How I wear a scarf: 1. Take scarf and drape it over my shoulder 2. Find an annoying co-worker and choke them to death with it. 3. Repeat"

"do these four empty jars of nutella make me look fat?"