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Joke of the Day

"I once dated a girl with a lazy eye, It was going well for a few months until I realized she was seeing someone else."

Next Joke
 
"Mom told meh to not waist my food She said we were gonna have to 'tighten our belts' around here."
"Free Tibet! With purchase of equal or greater Tibet."
"I bought a racehorse today and I named him My Face. I don't care if he doesn't win, I just want to hear a load of posh twats shouting, ""Come on My Face."""
"What do a woman and a bar have in common? Liquor in the front, poker in the back."
"The last person you would ever hear say ""hey gang"" is someone in an actual gang"
"Nurse walking down a hallway reaches into her pocket and pulls out a rectal thermometer... She says, ""Great, some asshole's got my pen."""
"What do you call an armadillo at a fashion show? A roll model"
"What do you do if a cow is in the middle of the road you're driving on? steer clear"
"The only thing I have to offer men is that I don't ask questions during a movie."
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