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Joke of the Day

"A Rabbi, a lawyer, and a Priest are on a sinking ship. The Rabbi says, ""Save the children!"" The lawyer says ""Fuck the children!"" ... The Priest says, ""Do we have time?"""

"It's easier to compliment a woman when you're traveling with a toddler. ""Son, say hi to the beautiful lady with the piercing green eyes."""

"How many suh dudes does it take to fix a light bulb? It's already lit fam"

"Have you heard about that new film about the tractor? I just saw the trailer."

"Q: How do you keep a moron in suspense?"

"My stalker just threatened to kill herself if I can't love her back. It's nice when problems resolve themselves."

"The frog was double parked... And that's why she got Toad."

"What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do? Go into town and gang-audit someone."

"Sometimes it just doesn't feel like putting the lotion on its skin."

"What's black and never works? Decaf coffee"