110080

Joke of the Day

"Why are people supporting Donald Trump? Because he has what plants crave; electrolytes."

"Yesterday I fell, landed on my back, and could not roll over and get up. At the time I was wearing a Turtleneck Sweater."

"Now if they could just make PokemonStop.. I could sit and actually enjoy this game! In playin pokemon Yellow right now ; p"

"I asked my gf to get the paper for me... ...She said ""Don't be silly, borrow my iPad"". That spider never knew what hit it."

"Debt collector are so persistent they never leave you a loan"

"Ever read the book ""A Race To The Bathroom""? by Willie Makeit and Betty Wont."

"The problem with girl scout cookies: no matter how many I eat, I always want Samoa."

"Walking inside a Nike store would be the worst place to contemplate suicide. Everything is saying Just Do It."

"[cop taps on my fogged up car window on make-out hill] ME: *alone holding a huge steamy bucket of fried chicken* what's the problem officer"

"I was going to tell a Nirvana joke, but... Nevermind."