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Joke of the Day

"I was speaking to a lad at work called krowski. I asked, ""So are you Polish?"" He said, ""No, my great grandad was."" I said, ""Oh, so you're just a tad pole?"""

"A Nurse finds a rectal thermometer in her pocket ...and says ""some asshole's got my pen"""

"What's the difference between your mom and an alpaca? One's a hairy beast that spits and the other's native to South America."

"Congratulations to Amy Winehouse For being sober one year."

"did you hear about the new tv crime drama? Criminal Mastermimes: the Silent Killers"

"Disney's Aladdin taught me that as long as you have a foundation of lies, actual magic, and one of you is rich, a relationship can work."

"A dung beetle walks into a bar. He says, ""Is this stool taken?"""

"I ran into a one armed fisherman I asked if he had any luck. He said ""yea caught one this big"" This joke works better in person."

"When starting a new relationship it's important to remember that someone already screwed them up for you."

"Two aerials meet on a roof fall in love get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant."