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Joke of the Day

"Why was the man with no arms or legs the BEST party host? Because no matter what, when you get to the front door you will always see a welcome Matt."

"I'm very good at hurdles In fact I hold the personal record"

"- The DC Cinematic Universe"

"So, you know how they put that magic hat on Frosty and it makes him talk? I wonder if there's one that works in reverse, but for children."

"What is best potato? Latvian potato is best potato. Is kind you spend whole life looking for. Also, low calories."

"Walked in on the big pillow in bed with my favorite blanket. Feel so betrayed."

"Why did the blonde have a sore belly button? Because there are blonde men too!"

"All You Need Is Love. And an IQ low enough to believe that."

"Remember, if you get dumped, it's only because they're looking for someone sexier and more attractive. It has NOTHING to do with you."

"A duck waddles into a lake... The geese say 'Hi Dave!' The boss faints."