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Joke of the Day
"How did the Hipster burn his tongue? He drank his coffee before it was cool."
Next Joke
"My friend's mouth and tongue were blistering and burning after eating tacos last night... serves him right! I told him not to eat Mexican."
"If by speaking Spanish you mean speaking in English but slower and louder, then yes, I speak Spanish."
"You know, I never understood why calling someone a pussy was an insult. I mean, you are what you eat."
"Why don't men want to go down on a woman first thing in the morning? .....have you ever tried to peel apart a grilled cheese?"
"Chuck Norris invented the spoon because killing people with knives was got boring."
"I like my coffee the same way I like my slaves.... Free."
"A feminist asked me how I saw lesbians. Apparently *in HD* wasn't the right answer."
"Son, my best advice is to find a girl with an embarrassing tattoo and marry her. She knows how to make bad decisions and stick with them."
"What did the mommy broom say to the baby broom? Time to go to sweep."