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Joke of the Day

"mad props to my friends from high school who are successfully balancing raising a baby and constantly posting someecards on facebook"

"Did you hear about that Muslim entrepreneur who invented springed prayer mats? His prophets went through the roof!"

"An Elephant Never Forgets 9/11 An Elephant never forgets how to ride a bicycle"

"""Daddy , how do stars die ?"" ""Drugs , usually"""

"My Friend Failed Astronomy... I failed too, if it's any constellation."

"Two fish swim into a concrete wall... The one fish turns to the other and says ""Damn""."

"Don't let go of your dreams Press snooze"

"What does a chef and a gravitational wave astronomer have in common? They both work in gastronomy"

"Where did people find out that Pluto was no longer a planet? The orbituaries."

"TV and the Internet are good because they keep stupid people from spending too much time out in public."