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Joke of the Day

"Why did it take three burly Boy Scouts to help the old lady across the street? Because she didn't want to go."

"Expecting a person of a certain race to constantly be commenting on their race is also a kind of racism."

"How do you test a saltshaker ? You call in a redditor."

"[invasion] *aircrafts dropping from the sky *explosions everywhere *mass hysteria Me scrolling phone: Where was that alien invader gif?"

"this harambe joke is getting too long already... ...can't someone just kill it?"

"What did the woodworm say to the chair ? It's been nice gnawing you !"

"""look, if it's no fancy dress then the funeral invite should have specified no fancy dress. And besides, your aunt loved minions"""

"I always avoid talking about bungee jumps when meeting new people... I just find it creates a lot of tension."

"What's a pirate's favorite video game? **Call of Booty.** Because there's mighty phat loot and booty ta be pillagin' and plunderin', matey."

"got so drunk last night that I ate a salad"