108930

Joke of the Day

"I went to the doctor to get tested for ADHD... he said I've got it so bad, I have AD Blu-Ray"

"If you're the guard at a Samsung store ... Does that make you the guardian of the galaxy?"

"Why did Thor file a police report? Because someone stole his thunder"

"So I Went to the doctor And he told me to quit masturbating. I said ""whys that?"" He said ""Because you're in my office"""

"I hate when I think of a great tweet and discover someone did it already. It's like that time I invented the wheelbarrow."

"So Kim Jong-un is claiming he personally hacked into Sony's servers in retaliation to them broadcasting a spoof interview. Is there no end to this Olympic gold Medallist's talent?"

"The fun way to tell if a celebrity is crazy is by how many times they delete and reactivate their Twitter account."

"My friend recently got crushed by a pile of books but he's only got his shelf to blame"

"I always eat tacos over a tortilla, so when stuff falls out BOOM extra taco"

"Sadly, at 8:11 PM Mark Jones was mispronounced dead. [at hospital] Doctor: I'm afraid this man has deed. Am I saying that right? He's deed."