10880

Joke of the Day

"About to finish my second book of the day! And when I say book, I really mean magazine. And when I say magazine, I really mean pizza."

"Why can't your penis be 12 inches? Because then it'd be a foot"

"Teacher: What are the four elements? Pupil: Fire Earth Water and the Internet. Teacher: What do you mean the Internet? Pupil: Well Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net I'm in my element."

"What do you call the horse than lives next door? A neighbour!"

"What do you call a Mexican that's in the rebellion? A Rogue Juan"

"President Trump received congratulations from the Pope himself... Because thanks to him half the world started praying."

"Phones are getting smarter and thinner. People, not so much."

"I posed naked for a magazine today Although from the reaction I got, I think the newsstand owner would have preferred money"

"I can't wait to tell my grandchildren how many times I've survived the end of the world."

"How do you stop a woman giving you a blow job? Marry her."