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Joke of the Day

"I asked my wife what would be the best way to get rid of our son's hiccups. She said, ""Stick on your priest costume."""

"Oliver Twist: ""Please sir, I want some more!?"" Manger: ""Kid, you do realize this is a buffet?"""

"On the demolition teams last job... They did a bang up job"

"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I've never paid $100 to have a garbanzo bean on my face"

"Keep in mind that parenting guides are written by people with enough free time & financial resources to write a parenting guide."

"Someone call a knight in shining armor... cuz today's a draggin."

"If a seagull lives by the sea... If a seagull lives by the sea, what do you call a bird that lives by the bay? A Bay Gull"

"How do you make the letter ""H"" healthy? You spin it. It becomes spin-h. juh-jen"

"Our Xmas dinner also happens to be my New Year's resolution Bone-less turkey"

"Glow in the dark condoms. Now you see it, now you don't! Now you see it, now you don't! Now you see it, now you don't! ..."