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Joke of the Day

"If you watch Harry Potter backwards, Voldemort is really good at zapping people back to life and turning Harry into a baby."

"When holding my baby neice My Uncle gave me the advice of ""Careful not to drop her, we dont want her to end up like you."""

"Moon Landing conspiracy theorists should be called Luna-tics Just posting here because r/showerthoughts doesn't allow puns."

"Ask someone how they're doing & they'll say fine. Share with them a random health issue & wait for the 20 min dissertation on their ailment."

"What's a redditor who makes pirate jokes' favorite letters? It could be R and the C, but they definitely aren't OC."

"Obama looks rough after the last 8 years in office. Still better than JFK after 2."

"What do we want? FLEXIBLE WORK SCHEDULES THAT ACCOMMODATE FAMILY LIFE! When do we want it? [Unintelligible yelling of different dates]"

"Patient: Doctor you must help me. I'm under such a lot of stress I keep losing my temper with people. Doctor: Tell me about your problem. Patient: I JUST DID DIDN'T I YOU STUPID BASTARD!!!"

"A high-dea supported by evidence... Is called a High-pot-thesis"

"Kid, ""Mom, Dad, I'm in love with a gopher from a funny animal video."" Parent, ""The Bible says Adam and Eve, not Allen! Allen! Allen! Steve!"""