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Joke of the Day

"""Torture me"" said the masochist. ""No"" the sadist smiled."

"What do being in the mafia and cunnilingus have in common... One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit!"

"A cop was outside my house talking to some people and my first thought was ""yesss"" because I'm nosey."

"Did you ever blow bubbles as as child? Yeh well he's back in town and wants your new number."

"Knowing is half the battle. The other half is choosing the right pokemon."

"Don't know why some countries have food problems If you're Hungary you could pour Greece over Turkey and fry it in Japan."

"Why do they call ""roach-clips"", ""roach-clips""??? because potholder was already taken. I know it's like a venn diagram of drug jokes and dad jokes."

"*wins oscar I'd like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them"

"What do you call it when Darth Vader moves one foot? The Imperial March"

"Just heard Kim Kardashian's new song. All I'm going to say is that, for as many black dudes as she bangs, I expected more."