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Joke of the Day

"If all the animals on the equator were capable of flattering Then halloween and thanksgiving would fall on the same day"

"My father always had affectionate nicknames for my older sister and me She was *oops*, and I was *oh shit*"

"An elephant never forgets My dick remembers everything."

"Sally Why could Sally never answer questions about her previous husbands? They all beat her."

"Girls really shouldn't wear animal print clothing... ...if they're bigger than the said animal."

"Did you know you can see through Caitlyn Jenner? She is trans-parent."

"The NSA is coming to town You better not call, You better not Skype, You better not type and I'm telling you why, The NSA is coming to town"

"What did the coma patient win? A-trophy."

"Why is it we trust politicians with creating jobs when they don't know a thing about working?"

"Im not saying I'm number one, uh sorry I lied I'm number one two three four and five."