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Joke of the Day

"It takes a long time for a giraffe... ...to swallow its pride."

"Dad Dragon: If we weren't supposed to eat them they wouldn't come w plates and toothpicks now finish ur damn knight Teen Dragon: I hate you"

"PSA: Don't forget to set your cocks black this weekend"

"Going to an event tonight and wearing a tuxedo. A real tux, not one of those cheapo ones. Seriously, this thing is made with actual penguin."

"A guy buys some condoms... A guy is buying a box of condoms at the store. After paying the clerk, the clerk asks him ""Do you want a paper bag with that?"" He replies, ""Nah, she's not that ugly."""

"My friend was called fat today. I told him ""It'll be okay, just keep your chins up""."

"I had a really long dream last night that I was a muffler under a car. When I woke up this morning I was exhausted!"

"*jumping on a trampoline* What do you mean you want full custody?"

"Why don't anti-vaxxers hang out in bars? They're afraid of the shots."

"The real question Am i the only one who thinks that porn websites should end in .cum instead of .com?"