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Joke of the Day
"Confucius says: ""Woman who fly upside in airplane have open cockpit."""
Next Joke
"Travel Agent: Hello sir! Interested in a vacation? Me: *puts cat on the phone* [20 mins later] Travel Agent: I've got you booked for Maui"
"Me: ""Can I put this sweatshirt in the dryer?"" Wife: ""Well, what does it say on it?"" Me: ""Buffalo Sabres."" Wife: ""You're an idiot"""
"Hey Kevin, why do you like fungi on your pizza? Cause I'm a vegetarian."
"How did the sloth become President of the tree? He slept his way to the top."
"Why was Jesus not born in West Virginia? Because they couldn't find three wise men or a virgin. Gf sent me this when she was driving through the state."
"Maybe mama duck isn't leading her babies, maybe she's trying to outrun them."
"I tried kombucha for the first time the other day. It made me feel very cultured."
"Wife: ""I saw a huge owl on my way home. Almost hit it with my car."" Me: ""Wow!"" Wife: ""Sorry, the correct response is 'O RLY?'"""
"Girl if you though you saw the whole bakery, you ain't seen muffin yet"