105425

Joke of the Day

"I met my wife in an African Languages class. We just clicked."

"4-year-old: What's ""saying grace?"" Me: It's when we thank the one who provided our food. 4-year-old: We thank the microwave?"

"The term ""mentally ill"" is reserved for white people. Brown people are called terrorists. Black people are called thugs."

"Airport Security: Please remove your shoes Man: Don't be ridiculous, I'm no terrorist AS: Sir, do you want to use the bouncy castle or not?"

"I'm looking for a girlfriend that likes me for my money, but is really bad at math..."

"Allergy alert: This tweet may contain peanuts."

"What time does Sean Connery go to Wimbledon? Ten-ish."

"Why do people throw coins into foutains? Why do people throw coins into fountains? I don't know, doesn't make any cents."

"I ate pelican today Never again. The bill was massive."

"How do you confuse a drummer? Give him sheet music"