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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between love, true love and showing off? Spit, swallow, gargle."

"Why is Hollywood full of vampires? They need someone to play the bit parts."

"Girl are you a dishwasher? Because I would like to fill you with my dirty load in the evening, turn you on, and fall asleep before you finish"

"People: Are you single? me: no i'm Album"

"If you steal my identity and get a credit card I'll be impressed. Not because you stole my identity, but because you got approved. Kudos!"

"Why did god give women yeast infections? So they know what it is like to live with an irritating cunt. Zing!"

"What's a ginger's favorite drink? Ginger ale!"

"I got caught in police speed trap yesterday. The officer walked up to my car and said ""I've been waiting all day for you "" Well I said. I got here as fast as I could."

"What do we want? A cure for Tourette's! When do we want it? Cunt!"

"Why did James Comey refuse to indict Hillary Clinton? Because he found his suicide note in her Wikileaks emails."