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Joke of the Day

"P is for psychic.... Pumpkin squash!!"

"If Wednesday is hump day... Would that make Tuesday foreplay day?"

"How do you cut the sea in half? With a seesaw (I'll see myself out)"

"INCREASINGLY DESPERATE GOOGLE SEARCH FOR ""HOW MANY SHADOWS SHOULD I HAVE?"""

"Then outermost layer of your skin is mostly dead cells, so congratulations you're dead on the outside as well as the inside."

"You probably get this a lot but... *punches you in the face*"

"Why can't some people help being born Chinese? Because there's nothing wong with it."

"[job interview] ""You wrote here your biggest weakness is not knowing what irony means."" ""Ironic isn't it? Is it? I don't know."""

"Friends invited me to a meteor shower party, but I couldn't make it. They were crushed."

"OMG!! I made a science Joke. What did the German small intestine say when you asked him if he would go to the party? -Vill i?"