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Joke of the Day

"I visited Detroit recently. I love the smell of the ol' factories."

"My wife said to me: ""If you won the lottery, would you still love me?"" I said: ""Of course I would. I'd miss you, but I'd still love you."""

"Where does a cow go to watch a film? The mooovies. pls tell to friends."

"I didn't think it was funny when I first wrote this one... I gair aunty this is gonna be five steps removed from swishing nebraskan listerine on a gold claim. ...I was right."

"Yo mama teeth are so yellow traffic slows down when she smiles!"

"Sad news. The end of a one-legged man I know is afoot."

"I have invented a new game. You lock yourself and 9 other friends in a house that has 2 bathrooms. You all then take a load of laxative and fight over the toilets. I call it 'Game Of Thrones'"

"What color is the most metal? Ma*djent*a"

"Just had my first threesome but it was not what I had envisioned. The other two guys seemed to like it just fine."

"I don't see the point of buying an autobiography when I can just flip to the last page and read the author's biography."