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Joke of the Day

"""You must be out yo damn mind"" = your behavior is very unorthodox and very contradictory towards my wishes"

"What does the cannibal do after he dumps his girlfriend? He wipes his butt!"

"How do eels get around the seabed? They go by octobus."

"My girl says I'm like a volcano in bed... Dormant"

"They say being a hostage is hard But I could do that with my hands tied behind my back."

"What do you call the useless piece of skin on the dick? The man"

"What's the core body temperature of a Tauntaun? Luke Warm"

"One of the worst things about tweeting while driving is all of the people that seem to appear out of nowhere on the sidewalk."

"Tan lines are like highlighter for your most awesome body parts."

"At some point in time, the brain named itself. You think it would have gone with something a little better, like Bernard."