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Joke of the Day
"Why should you always keep a firearm in the small room by your front door? Foyer protection"
Next Joke
"I get 9"" in bed every night. That's how much mattress is left for me once the dogs get comfortable."
"I got tired of wearing my watch on my wrist.. So I tried attaching it to my belt instead.. man, that was a real waist of time."
"What do you get when you cross the Atlantic ocean with the Titanic? About halfway. ^^I'll ^^see ^^myself ^^out..."
"How do you blindfold an Asian? With dental floss."
"Why did mozart kill his chickens? Because they were always saying, ""Bach, Bach, Bach, Bach"""
"Why did the polish navy start putting glass floors on their boats? So every time they went out to sea, they could look at their old ships."
"[final debate] TRUMP: I'd like to apologize to hillary MODERATOR: umm ok HILLARY: umm ok TRUMP: I brought a gift *hands her a galaxy note 7*"
"What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you feed your self with that?"
"When I was a kid, I had to quit the marching band based on my religious principles. I was a real tuba leaver back then."