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Joke of the Day

"So if you want to be sure your internet history is deleted, just whisper 'please delete my internet history' into any hole on the computer"

"Every so often, I try to fornicate a large word into conversation, even if I'm not sure what it means"

"Did you hear about the surgeon who slipped whilst performing a circumcision?........ ......................he got the sack!"

"CNN is fucked if their viewers ever discover they can access the Internet on their own."

"In the event of death... find peace in Trump."

"Why can Unicorns only be ridden by a adult female virgin? They're both imaginary"

"What do you do if life gives you melons? You're dyslexic."

"I wish Facebook would notify me when people deleted me, that way I could like it"

"The best part about having a homeless girlfriend? After the date, you can just drop her off anywhere."

"What do you call an Egyptian spine adjuster? A Cairopractor"