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Joke of the Day

"What do the Patriots and Measles have in common? They both got to go to Disneyland, because some idiot decided to pass on something."

"How much resistance can a Buddhist monk endure? Ohmmmmmm............?"

"A man is shot... He recently converted to islam."

"People with chrons disease Really need to get their shit together."

"Pretty sure Brazil has an enormous wax museum."

"My ex wrote to me: Can you delete my number? I responded: Who is this?"

"It is true. Time flies when you are having fun. However it is also true that Time eventually rests on a tree branch and shits on your head."

"Riding in the car with a chiropractor... ... when he clearly takes the wrong exit. I ask why and he says... ""I'm not driving us under there! You wanna get carpool tunnel syndrome!?"""

"What did Ohio say to Oklahoma? Oh, hi ""O"". `ifit'sbaddon'tkillme`"

"If you buy orange juice with ""Some Pulp,"" it's time to pick a side."