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Joke of the Day

"Using only a paperclip, taffy, and rubber band, MacGuyver left another shitty tip."

"Go up to a guy in a bar and whisper ""hey do you wanna get out of here?"" and if he says yes, you can sit where he was."

"A man with anxiety accidentally annoyed the cartel He began seeing a psychiatrist because of hispanic attacks."

"Why do hens sit on eggs? because they're too poor to afford chairs."

"Just had a 10 minute argument about the importance wearing pants in public with a 5yo She won, today I wear pants when I take her to school"

"How I feel when watching youtube... I dont mind the buffer ... I dont mind the adds... But when the ads buffer... I suffer"

"Calm down 'Fitbit' joggers. I can drink one 5-Hour Energy and reach my target heart rate without even getting off my couch"

"My rap name is When i$ Lunch"

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those who understand binary, those who don't, those who think this joke is in base 3, and those who know this joke is in base 4."

"Trying out that new pickup line on a girl for the first time; whether it works or not, you'll wind up feeling a twat. *EYYYYYY*"