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Joke of the Day

"What do pancakes and kids have in common? The first one usually gets screwed up."

Next Joke
 
"Met this chinese guy with the surname Shen. His name's Eric. As in Eric Shen. Have him for more than 4hours, call a doctor!"
"Society's a wreck because Superman has nowhere to change."
"Why shouldn't you take the Fourier transform of a square pulse while on a boat? Because you don't wanna sinc!"
"Cop: license and registration please. Me: (gives cop both) Cop: you drinking tonight? Me: no. Cop: you handed me 2 empty beer cans."
"Whats the difference between a Cat and a Compound Sentence? One has claws at the end of its paws, one has a pause at the end of its clause."
"How do you become a millionaire in post-Brexit UK? First, start off with a billion pounds.."
"Who are your favorite underground artists?? Mine are Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston"
"It was my first time getting laid 5 minutes ago I'm hoping to hatch soon."
"I'm at my sexiest when I'm at a stoplight and a teenage boy is checking me out then suddenly realizes his horrific mistake."