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Joke of the Day

"As a gamer, who experiences little to no drama, I'm always so confused about this game referendum. They're not playing video games, they're playing drama, the game. I hear it got bad reviews."

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"Q: Why was King Tutenkhamen considered the best pharaoh in all of Egypt? A: Because he always showed up in cuneiform."
"A fun thing to do is to tell a complete stranger that you met your boyfriend on Twitter and then show them a cat."
"What do you call an aging actor who has finally paid off his house? Mortgage freeman."
"If a blue man lives in the blue house and a red man lives in the red house, who lives in the white house? A white man."
"I brought a dyslexic girl home last night. She cooked my sock."
"new instagram notification - Girl Who Actually Secretly Hates You Commented 'omg literally why are u so perfect'' On Your Photo!"
"My Twitter clique is basically five or six people who have mistaken me for someone else."
"*Wife walks in, the house is trashed* ""OMG..we've been burgled"" *I jump out of the closet in full hockey gear* HAVE YOU SEEN THE WASP KAREN?"
"What does a mentally challenged Time Lord use for travel? A retardis."