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Joke of the Day

"Why do women like Ryan Gosling? Because he is always Gosling around..... A co-worker snickered so I figued share."

"911 what's your emergency? I FARTED ON THE FIRST DATE. Ma'am we don't-- IT SOUNDED LIKE A BALLOON ANIMAL ASKING A QUESTION"

"I saw a funny post on 9GAG but then I realized I had already Reddit."

"A man was dissatisfied with a Chad Kroeger album he bought off of the 95% rack... So he returned it and got his Nickelback"

"Why do giraffes have long necks? Because their feet stink."

"Teacher:""To which family does the elephant belong ?"" Pupil:""I don't know nobody I know owns one !"""

"I can't define ""pattern matching"" ...but I know it when I see it."

"I can't wait for my girlfriend to get up and swap tampons. Let's see what she thinks of the party popper I've put inside her."

"What's the difference between a goat and a ram? I don't goat my dick up a dead baby's ass."

"My boss has a rather shrill phone voice. I once spent 20m talking to him, before realizing it was actually someone trying to send us a fax."