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Joke of the Day

"How come there are like a thousand songs about Christmas but only one song about the boys being back in town? This is not original"

"Potassium and Oxygen went on a date. It was OK."

"I'm allergic to chickpeas. Any time I eat them I falafel."

"A man knocked my door for some donation.. Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool. i gave him a glass of water."

"What are peas attracted to? Chickpeas"

"It goes without saying, that..."

"What's the difference between Jesus and a bunch of Mexicans? Jesus doesn't have a bunch of Mexicans tattooed all over himself."

"Why was Kermit chased by nazis as a kid? He was a Tad-Pole"

"I hate it when employees ask to go home sick Diarrhea is a really shitty excuse. And vomiting is always a toss up."

"Cute skinny girls wearing weird mismatched clothes: hot quirky hipsters Me wearing weird mismatched clothes: homeless lady from the 80s"