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Joke of the Day

"Another 69 joke So I asked my gf if she wanted to 69. She rolled her eyes and said sure as long as we can 77 after cause I'll probably finish too fast and she'll still need to be ate more."

"There were two fish in a tank. There were two fish in a tank. One turns to the other and says, ""Do you know how to drive this thing?"" How much do pirates pay for their earrings? A buccaneer."

"[NSFW] What is the difference between two towers? A plane"

"4: can you whistle? M: *whistles* 4: Here's a booger. M:... 4: Keep it forever. Have kids they said. It'll be fun they said. Liars."

"Two ships crashed in the night one ship was carrying red paint the other blue The survivors were marooned"

"Since I'm home alone tonight, I'm carrying around the biggest kitchen knife I could find. You know, to stab any murderers who come for me."

"How do you make holy water? You just boil the hell out of it!"

"Where does an atom go when it breaks down? A quantum mechanic. lel"

"I like my women like I like my car parking spaces... Disabled only."

"What's the difference between Pastor Maldonado and a bus driver? One is a highly skilled professional driver, and the other is in Formula 1."