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Joke of the Day

"Either the kids on my street were playing with sidewalk chalk, or this is a crime scene and a bunch of stars and cats just got murdered."

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"What do you call Russian trees? Dimitrees"
"A young boy died after having sex with his teacher... His friends high fived him to death. Zak galifinakorishdjignko"
"What's another word for a penis potato? A dictator"
"How do you tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber? Ask them to say the word, ""unionized""."
"My friend came crying to me after he crashed his brand new Swedish car But I didn't want to hear his Saab story"
"Are you made of Copper and Tellurium? Because you're CU TE"
"Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation? He said ""So that I can feed my lads with m'lasses."""
"Yo mama is so hairy... ...She doesn't have a bush, she has a whole damn rain forest."
"Why did the dog run in circles? He was a watchdog and needed winding."