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Joke of the Day

"Gotta be tough for the guy somewhere who has to say ""yeah, she left me for Charles Manson."""

"Looking out the hospital window while mom is resting on bed. That was either dad or superman falling of the roof."

"Bae: come over Me: can we ever have normal conversations Bae: my parents aren't home Me: why can't you just ask how good my day was for once"

"As I rowed my little boat Toward the river shore, A small black bird kept me from landing, Quoth the raven, ""never moor."""

"Kids today will never know what it's like to have a 3rd grade teacher who teaches every subject and even serves as dentist on fluoride day."

"PLEASE LEAVE CHRIS BROWN ALONE, in the woods, surrounded by a pack of wolves."

"Why do Canadians like number systems greater than Base-10? Because 7 8 9, A?"

"Knock knock. Who's there? A black guy. ""A black guy who?"" ""A black guy who doesn't pay his child support."" ""I'm sorry, you're going to have to be more specific than that."""

"I swear if I hear Uptown Funk one more time... I will smash my radio. Don't believe me? Just watch"

"I have to work new years eve. But I'm not upset, after work I have the rest of the year off."