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Joke of the Day

"Something is always going on in the kitchen, but you never know whats cooking till the end when you eat... Is that why they call it the final supper?"

"What do you here when Mickey and Minnie are doing it? Squeak, Squeak, Squeak"

"There's only one difference between Cinco de Mayo and St. Patrick's Day... On Cinco de Mayo no one wants to pretend to be Mexican."

"Last night I dreamed the oceans were made of orange soda. But it was just a Fanta sea."

"What are Mario's pants made out of? DenimDenimDenim"

"Boob Job What do you call the space between a woman's enhanced breasts? Ans: Silicon Valley."

"[demetri martin] A drunk driver is very dangerous. Everybody knows that. But so is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive. ""Go left."" -""Dude those are trees."" ""trust me."""

"Stop trying to make small talk with me in an elevator. It's 2013, .... Stare at your phone like a normal person."

"Why did the baker not allow greedy people to eat his goods? Because he wanted his produce to be glutton free."

"They say don't drop the soap, they are right. You will slip on it and fall, I have first hand knowledge. Don't worry I'm fine, only a little drain bamage."