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Joke of the Day

"Why is your dad chasing those pigs through the garden? We're raising mashed potatoes."

"An untalented gymnast walks into a bar."

"If I died suddenly, I wonder if anyone would take my previously unreleased tweets & remix them with Akon or whatever."

"Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr Dre..."

"My dad is a magician. He even has a trick that makes him turn invisible. He's been doing it for the last 32 years."

"How did the butcher introduce his wife? Meet Patty!"

"My girlfriend broke up with me. She said ""I'm sorry, but you're just too immature."" I looked her dead in the face and said ""Get the fuck outa my treehouse!"""

"I hired a pizza chef as my new golf coach. One way or another the dude is gonna fix my slice."

"I skipped the 9 puns and killed the last one. That's a pun in ten dead."

"Why was the lesbian mermaid fired from the bakery? She was eating all the muff-fins."