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Joke of the Day

"DR DOG: We need to talk about your weight. PATIENT: I'm not fat. I'm just big boned. DR DOG: *drooling everywhere* Just how big exactly?"

"What does a cow's fart smell like? dairy-air"

"Threesome fun!!! I had planned a threesome, but there were two no shows. I still had fun though!!!"

"Who was the dankest dictator of all time? LMao Zedong"

"Whats the best part of fuckin a pregnant woman? you get a handjob at the same time"

"What do you call a murderer who pours their mike before the cereal? A cereal killer!"

"What do nosy peppers do? They get jalapeno business. :)"

"Why did Neil Armstrong get to set foot on the moon before Buzz Aldrin? They wrestled over it. Neil had the stronger arm."

"Why are babies always gurgling with joy? Because it's a nappy time."

"Lawrence starts cooking Lawrence checks Twitter Lawrence smells smoke Lawrence Fishburne"