98638

Joke of the Day

"[at the drs] Dr: are you sexually active? Me: yeah Dr: with real people Me [avoiding eye contact & twisting my foot in the ground]: yip"

"A man walks into a bar... And is disqualified from the Limbo tournament"

"What does it mean if the Holy Water sizzles when it hits your skin (asking for a friend)"

"A guy came to my bar the other day and told me ""hey man I don't have much money, can you just give me your cheapest shot?"" . . I said ""Yeah, your ugly and your mom dresses you funny""."

"Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? It was a while ago... but I heard he's al right now"

"A 4 year old boy examined his testicles... while taking a bath. 'Mom', he asked, 'Are these my brains?' 'Not yet', she replied"

"If a man thinks blondes have the best butts... ...and the verifies this by only watching blondes walk around, is he guilty of Confirmation By-Ass?"

"Have you heard of the band 1023 MB? Have you? No? Probably because they don't have any GIGS!"

"What's worse than finding a hole in your condom? Finding a condom in your hole."

"Why did Bill Cosby go to Japan with a bag of roofies? He had Jello fever!"