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Joke of the Day

"Neil Armstrong v. Michael Jackson What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong ACTUALLY walked on the moon and Michael Jackson raped children."

"Star Wars Episode 7? What's next, Star Wars Episode 8???"

"I stole a friend's phone today and set it so it will autocorrect ""I've"" to ""me've"" and me'm really excited about it."

"Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: ""Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet"""

"I undo his overall strap & slide it off a barely perceptible shoulder. I pull his steel work goggle down around his ""neck"" ""BanaNA"" he moans"

"An old Chinese saying: If the dog is barking, you didn't cook it enough."

"Whats the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?? A hooker can clean her crack and sell it again."

"Donald trump already has a private jet he plans on putting in production for his presidency. He's calling it the hair force one."

"what does a family dentist and a pedophile have in common? They both fill little kids' cavities. Original by me."

"A massive meteor hit Russia injuring hundreds. Rihanna insists the meteor has changed & that everyone should give the meteor another chance."