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Joke of the Day

"Tripped in a curry house... It went from bad to worse when slipped into a korma (coma) I just invented this joke. It might only work with Mancunian accent?"

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"What do you call scriptures for blind people? The holy braille"
"What did King Arthur do in Camelot? He ""came"" a lot."
"So I'm not showing up to any Halloween parties this year... I'll be telling everyone I'm Malaysia Airlines Flight 370."
"I saw a synopsis and some abstracts shot down in a hail of bullet points. I guess it was a summary execution."
"Hi, how much for this torture device? Sir, that's a wedding ring."
"Whatever happened to that little girl from The Ring, did she grow up to be Kristen Stewart?"
"How many Brits does it take to change a broken lightbulb? None. They just move out of the house."
"What do you call someone who sews extremely fast? Taylor Swift..."
"Home alone watching porn What goes black, red,black,red,black,red,black,red, white? A negro wanking"