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Joke of the Day

"I had a parrot that talked . . . but it never said, ""I'm hungry."" So it died."

"Whats the technical term for a female to male sex change? An adadictomy"

"I got in an argument with Kobe Bryant. I now have Kobe Beef."

"Cops: You were driving while intoxicated nnMe: I was in no condition to walk"

"Do you want to know why I called your girlfriend a tractor? Because she's an upgrade to that hoe you had earlier."

"How many people from Cornwall does it take to change a lightbulb? They don't care, as long as they do it better than people from Devon."

"Why is the Joker's makeup like a whitewashed tomb, his lips like torn paper, his eyes like burning suns? Because when he was young, the Joker's father said ""Let's put a simile on that face!"""

"I told my buddy that Jewish people call god by a different name He was like, ""No way!"" I was like, ""Yahweh"""

"""Mr. President, N. Korea is threatening to bomb your birthplace"" ""Why, there's nothing for them in Keny-"" ""HAWAII, sir"" ""Right, that's wh"

"I was down the gym this morning, when I noticed a hole in my trainer just big enough to get my finger in... ...Anyway, she's now made a formal complaint and I'm barred for life."