98266

Joke of the Day

"[Ouija Board] ""Oh great spirits tell me ur secrets"" You'll die soon ""OMG HOW"" Hold on I have another call"

"Sometimes Victoria's Secret is Victor's secret on weekends."

"Lawyers and Prostitutes If a solicitor engages in solicitation and a prostitute engages in prostitution, then why do prostitutes get booked for solicitation and solicitors get paid to screw people?"

"ME: i need a loan so i can build a robot army to take over the world with BANKER: what M: oops i meant 'with which to take over the world'"

"Why do you have 0 viewers on Twitch? Because not even Nightbot is watching you."

"When you go to the hospital and there's music playing These are some sick beats!"

"doctor: ""is there anything that runs in the family?"" wife: ""hm not really"" me: ""the dog jogs a lot"""

"What is a Nazi baker's secret ingredient? White Flour!"

"I bet those 300 Greek soldiers would have stood a better chance if they thought to wear armor instead of going to war in capes & speedos."

"I like my coffee like I like my women... without a penis."