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Joke of the Day

"If we really want our kids to be smarter, we should require pornstars to moan historical facts during sex"

"It's not as exciting when you realize his name is actually Harold Potter"

"TIFU by locking up an underage girl in my sex dungeon Whoops, wrong sub"

"How can you tell if a girl is too young for you? You need to make the airplane sound to put your cock in her mouth. (From one of my favorite stand-ups, Jimmy Carr!)"

"What does a fresh egg say when you try to hardboil it? It'll take me about 20 minutes to get hard, I just got laid by some chick."

"You don't have to be good at anagrams to see that Pope Benedict is an Epic Bent Pedo."

".@Schwarzenegger I just wanted to let you know that every single article I've ever read about you spells ""Australia"" wrong. G'day mate!"

"A black woman called Betty came into my restaurant the other day... She asked, ""Is there any chicken on the menu?"" I replied, ""No black Betty, it's ham or lamb"""

"I got an email telling me that it was vegan month... I felt bad putting the message in spam."

"How does the moon cut his hair Eclipse it"