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Joke of the Day
"What did the Third Reich say when they fired Hitler? ""You're ladolf."""
Next Joke
"Last night I was laying in bed, looking at the stars... And then I wondered, Where the fuck did my roof go?"
"Where's the 'Alpha male' bint putting out a video that becomes famous for the line ""LEAVE JEREMY (Clarkson) ALONE!""?... In written form on every comment thread of every relative social media post."
"How do you cover 12 holes with one hole? Take a flute and shove it up your ass."
"I want to open a clock shop... The commercials will say: ""I sell some of the finest wrist timepieces around. Don't believe me? Just watch."""
"[around campfire] ME: *grabs guitar* Hey kids how about a song? KIDS: Yeah! ME: ok *clears throat* LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR LET THE BODI"
"what's big, black and looks good on a lawyer's neck? a doberman"
"If Gandalf was a women, what color would her robes be? Red."
"I haven't heard from DAEMON MAILER in years. I really hope he's okay..."
"What do you get if you cross a student and an alien ? Something from another universe -ity !"